The Things You Make Me Do

You make me sigh just at the thought of you,
You make me so insanely happy just from a simple 'hello'.
I am elated when I see you smiling.
I go crazy because I have plenty of fantasies of things I'd do with you.
I can't get enough of admiring you.
You make me think that there might be a perfect person in this world after all.
You make me defy logic and do things I thought I'd never do.
You make me still keep my feelings for you even when God has told me they wouldn't last.

I've had this feeling before.
I just know this wouldn't last... but,
I'm still liking you.
I don't want to.
But I am.

I know I'll never reach you,
but I'm still hopelessly wishing that one day, you would notice me.
And realize how much this really means to me.
And yet, I know you won't.
Because you don't have the time for me.
You don't even look at me,
I'm forced into the paradox I created on my own.

I regret it very much.
If only I could turn back time..
I wouldn't have fallen for the one before.
Because I only liked you to get over the other.
But before I knew it, I fell once again,
in the illusion we all know
as love.

Our Wayward Story

Chap 1: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=225935610808140
Chap 2: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=225948114140223
Chap 3: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226016957466672
Chap 4: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226042377464130
Chap 5: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226055204129514
Chap 6: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226098810791820
Chap 7: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226106060791095
Chap 8: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226119294123105
Chap 9: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226129900788711
Chap 10: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226149360786765
Chap 11: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226188987449469
Chap 12: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226204774114557
Chap 13: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226481154086919
Chap 14: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226514740750227
Chap 15: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226555034079531
Chap 16: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226564190745282
Chap 17: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226584864076548
Chap 18: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226630580738643
Chap 19: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226641857404182
Chap 20: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226673467401021
Chap 21: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226694280732273
Chap 22: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=226721094062925
Chap 23: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=227040557364312
Chap 24: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=227049580696743

Why are some people just so naturally ANNOYING?

They really get on my nerves.
Those people that correct your every mistake.
That points out your flaws indirectly but makes sure you know it even though you already do.
That insults you behind your back but make sure you know about that TOO.
They think their OH-SO-GOOD at English. Like they are a god. And that they have every right to correct your grammar even though it was just a typo.
And they always say 'Oh I'm not smart' but they are not saying it because they feel burdened or anything, but because they want you to feel WORSE than you already are.
And they criticize you for even the littlest thing you make a mistake on.
They act like you're their bestest closest buddy when their down or need something from you, but in actual fact, when they DON'T need you, they diss you and hang with the 'better' people.

I MEAN.
WHAT IS THEIR PROBLEM?

Can't they stick to one path?
Don't they get tired of getting around all the time?
Must they hurt people like this?
No wait.
ARE THEY BORN THIS WAY LADY GAGA?

UGH. I'm so mad.
I hate them I hate them I hate them!

And the worst thing is that even though they stink and suck and are just a load of crap,
I still want to be their friend.
I still want to get to know them better.

Damn.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM?

A Life To Complete

Life is simple,

But our courage often dwindles,

Even when we are assured,

we can't help but be absurd.

Once in a while we have to look at the bigger picture,

to think freely, to feel secure.

Not everything will be exactly the way we want it to be,

that is why there are times we have to give up,

even when we're at the top.

Love is a riddle,

while life is a puzzle,

you solve and complete it,

because that's really just what its all about:

A life to complete.

Guard Your Heart

Girls, guard your heart! Don't fall for BOYS too easily.
The only thing they know to do is to break your heart ):
Love true males. MEN.

In the future.
They are worth so much more of your time and feelings.
don't was your time now.

TEEHEE.
I THINK IM GOING CRAZY.
YES. CRAZY WITH BOREDOM.

I really need to find something to do huh ._.

Its Not Easy But I'll Survive

As it is in friendship, so will it be in studies and family. And love.  (if I will ever have one that is.)
Its definitely hard to be successful in each and every one of them. No one said it was going to be easy.
But then, no one said it was going to be too hard either right?
And what's a dish without some salt?
What's life without falling? And getting back up again?

Actually I'm kind of tired of pre-judging things all the time. And tired of assuming, lying, pitying myself and faking every thing that I do.
I just want to be true. Not only to me but to others as well.
Its not like I want to be a good kid or whatever.
But I'm just really exhausted.
And I think its about time I turn over a new leaf.
For real.
Even if its difficult and close to impossible, I have to at least try.

I have to be a person of truth, honesty, dignity, kindness, hard work and love.
Although I can't say about the mistakes I will make,
I still have to start. And by starting, I mean by next year. I just really have to. I must.

I have to start before its too late. For my own sake. So I do not affect others around me too.
I want to bring about happiness, not sadness.
I have to smile truly, not in a lie.
I have to work hard to achieve my dreams, not sit around and do nothing.
I have to learn to love others properly, not avoiding people who I think are unnecessary in my life.

If I want to earn something I've always wanted but have never gotten before, I must work hard and do something I've never done before.
That is the way karma works. That's the way LIFE goes.
It just isn't fair for a lazy person to steal the prize, is it?

Even if I have to sacrifice some things, I will do it.

I will.

I'm Pretty Sure

I'm pretty sure everything will work out right. Well, at least for me.

It worked the same way for her. So it shouldn't be much different for you.

When I leave one day, I will want to remember everyone except you.

Its hard to accept this truth. But its even harder to accept the things you throw at me.

So I vow to never feel this way so easily again.

Goodbye. Forever.

OMG. My tickets to Perth have been confirmed! :D
I'm gonna meet my cousin there soon. She's really glad and I guess I am too.
After this year, everything's gonna be tough. Educationally. And I'll have to work harder and smarter to achieve my goals.

So for now, I have to enjoy. As much as possible.
I need to hang out.
Or maybe do things I'll get less time to do next year. And the year after that.
Work hard on my DDR skills (yes I'm getting better!)
exercise more, laugh more, get prettier and more than anything, have fun :)

You..

I don't know what I did to you. Any of you. I honestly don't.
Is it a sin to look the way I do? Is it also a sin that I naturally feel shy around others?
So.
Its my fault.
That I can't sing very well in front of a large crowd.
And that I TRY to look pretty to make up for it.
Is that so bad?
At least I tried.

I, on the other hand, have never insulted you so terribly before.
Sure, you might not believe me because you never really know when someone insults you behind your back
BUT do you really think I'm like that?
Do you think I'll deliberately backstab you? Even if I don't know you very well?

Well. Maybe that's how you think of me.
Maybe you think I'm a bitch. A slut. A playgirl. I'm LOA. I don't deserve the attention.
Then fine.
Then let me ask you a question:
Does every human being have a certain level of receiving attention and friends?
Does every person deserve to have more/less attention than others?

If you think 'yes' then you're effing wrong.
It just shows how much of a bitch, slut, and LOA person YOU are.
It shows the level of your mentality.
You might be 15. or 16.
But your brain is no better than a 10 year old.

Grow up.
Face reality.
Be rational, logical and fair.
Then maybe one day you might receive the treatment you deserve and always wanted so badly.

Hey!

Hey everyone :) Its been a while.
I've been busy trying out things I've wanted to do to feed my boredom.

And.. well, I tried this.. thing.
Its kind of like twitter... but 40% korean (since its an alternate co-site that was purposely translated to english for english users..)
And yes, its originally korean :)

I had nothing to do lol.
its called me2day. it has pretty tight privacy settings too.

I'm halfway through Playful Kiss.
Hehe. Wish you all had a fun day ^^
That's all for now.
Thanks for reading!

Looking Beyond Prejudice

It is hard to live without prejudging people based on my first impression of them.
I never wanted to. But it just comes so naturally.
And today I just realized one of the best things of being able to see the true colors of a person regardless of their looks, size, weight, height or hairstyle.

She WAS the other best friend of my WAS best friend.
And we used to have a silent war. Though none of us spoke, it was evident enough.
I used to hate her. A lot.
I'd always thought she's stuck up and the 'popular' type. Which I used to hate a lot.

Then we both grew up. And well my WAS best friend wasn't my best friend anymore.
I didn't want to bother or care anymore. It was just such a pain the neck.
Well, in short: I gave up on her.

And I started to look at the bigger picture of things.
I made new friends. New BETTER friends.
Found a new best friend that's worth so much more of my time,
with common interests and better understanding.

Then THAT best friend of my ex-best friend started to leave that 'popular' group as well.
She was.. kind of astray.
You know, like you don't know where you belong?
Yeah that feeling. It sucks.

So I don't know how but somehow things started to liven up a bit when I gave up on my ex-best friend.
We started at first by saying 'hi' and 'bye' to each other.
Then later we started little conversations,
then we started sitting together when she left the group,
and suddenly we're like CLOSE FRIENDS! :D

She's really nice, and talented, and cute, and funny and .. different. UNIQUE is a better word for it.
She can sing really well. She has nice hair. She can play guitar (which rocks!)
We both realized that how we used to silently fight with each other was really stupid and childish.
To think that it was for a silly girl who never appreciated our kindness and care.

I hope she'll succeed in the competition that's coming up soon. *winks winks*

No Room For You

Yeah sure I was nervous.. and awkward.. and a little silent..
I bet you thought I was mad or being distant or ignoring you or whatever.
But aren't you doing the same?

Anyway I'm too busy to give a damn anymore.
I got my studies.
My movies.
My celebrities to fawn over.
My chocolate.
My dreams.
My goals.
And my future to deal with.

If I were ever to think otherwise,
I'd be a fool.

I see you still haven't changed. Until now.
When are you going to change? Are you going to wait till the last minute?
It won't work.
Well if you want to take things the hard way,
then by all means,
go ahead.

Success?

I'm glad.
Now that I think about it..
I really have solved all my problems.
Well, socially anyway. Teehee.

The one with Chanelle in the past,
when I got mad at Yi Wen (which was really childish) its over now and I'm satisfied~
I got to the other groups better.
I've moved on from my crush.
I've given up on ZE.
I'm fine with myself.
I'm ready to take on new challenges next year.

To be honest, sometimes I do feel kind of lonely.
I mean I do have a lot of friends.. and I mean A LOT.
But, I don't feel the connection with them. The type that I've always wanted ever since I was a little girl.
But then I think of other people and..
yeah many of them feel the same way too.
Emotional. Depressed. Lonely. Lack of Attention. Insecure.

I'm not alone.
We all aren't :)
That's the good thing about being in a community.
We all learn to face the world and things that are thrown to us and make good things out of it.

I feel like I've crossed yet another hurdle in another aspect of my life.
Just recently I've crossed PMR.. so I guess that's in uh.. my future career aspect?
Now's the social aspect of my life...
I have a feeling something hasn't begin yet.
Something.. Out of the world. Extraordinary. Different. Special.

Something that even if it has started, I would only be somewhere near the starting line.
I wonder what it is?
It may be my love life.. but I don't know for sure.
I'm ready to face that part of me .. well partially.
Because I doubt I'm no where near enough mature yet.

I'm ready God.
Thank You for lifting me up once again even though I'm such a moody person who takes things for granted all the time.
Thank You.
I hope your plan takes its course soon.
You made me strong for this.
You helped me put on my armor.
So I will not be weak in the battlefield.

Convincing Myself

That I can do it. Whatever that I want to do.
That I'm not ugly and hopeless like everyone thinks I am.
That I actually have the potential to be someone else that's better.

Or.. what was it at chapel today about?
Perception?
Yeah.. I wonder if its about that..
But I'm pretty effing sure everyone thinks I'm just leftover.
I'm always at the corner somewhere.
Trying to convince myself that I'm better than what they think I am.

...Which .. well.. I don't know.

Compared to my best friend Christine,
I feel even more discolored.
Even if she's quiet and don't talk much, at least more people talk to her than me.
At least guys think she's more attractive than I am.

What.. who am I?
What is my standard?
Am I really that low?
Because I feel that low.
I don't know who to ask assurance from.

...God?

You Male B-word

Just because you have a little swag.
Just because you're a tad cuter than the rest.
Just because you were gifted with the looks.
Does not mean you have the right to look down on everyone else.
And take every advantage of what was given to you.

Like, what is wrong with you?
Do you think its easy and customary for a girl to like a guy and just fall out of it? And then like another again as if nothing happened?
Is it like that for you?
Are you that irresponsible or clueless?

When a girl likes a guy for who she knows he can be or who he really is,
it means she LOVES him. Even when he's at his lowest. When he stinks like he just came out from the garbage truck and she still talks to him, smiles at him, makes him feel appreciated.
You don't understand do you?

Is it your hobby now?
Like 'yeah I got this cute look so I can go around making chicks like/love me and bang them like its 2012 and toss them aside. Well there's always more.'
Is it so pleasurable to know that you have admirers?
HUH?
Do you know what damage you're causing?

There's a reason why girls fall in love with you just like how there's a reason when they cry.. even if you don't know it.
Don't go around breaking their hearts just for the sake of it.
WAKE UP. This is your wake up call.

You're not even anywhere near smart. You still have a chance. Work hard towards it.
You think in this condition you can even carry on with your favorite 'hobby' in the future?
Do you think you can manage it?
You're ruining your future.

*BREATHES*

That's right you a-hole of boy.
I liked you. Lucky for me I didn't love you. But there is a girl.. who does.
Stop this nonsense.
Its so stupid. Stop acting dumb and face reality and work towards building your future.

I know there's so much more you can do.
I can feel it.
That's why I liked you.
But I give up because my conscience is telling me its impossible.

I'm not ready to believe that just yet.
I believe everyone has a second chance.
Even a player.. a clown... a heartbreaker like you.

The Better Way

Hehe hi. Its me, again. I hope you never expect anyone else X)
Oh what am I talking about. Of course its me. No one else knows my password :)

So I've been thinking. And this phrase has been in my mind for about a month now..
"Why frown when you can smile?"
Is that even called a phrase? haha.

Well anyway.. It just came to me. I never read anything about it or heard of it anywhere.
It kinda just popped into my mind somehow and it just stays there and occupies the now empty brain of mine.
It allows me to gain an upper hand over my temper and childishness.
If you think about it, it does make sense.
After all, it IS scientifically proven that it takes less face muscles to smile than to frown.
Well emotionally speaking, it makes you feel lighter and you know, makes you feel like life's so much brighter when you smile.

It helps me think and look at things from the brighter side.
And suddenly, things don't seem so bad anymore.
Like, I know my dad always lashes out at me and not my sis.
But then I remember that he loves me. And if he doesn't, why does he bother buying me food, clothes? Giving me a shelter? Especially the expensive school fees? and even in the future?
Same goes for my mum. And my sis.
And as for my friends, their not perfect too. People can piss others off sometimes without even knowing it since we're all imperfect in many ways. And I should learn to forgive. Seriously.

We're all only human. We lose and win some :)

People Who Truly Care

I know I'm ugly. I know I'm pretty. I know I'm stupid. I know I'm smart. I know I'm clingy. I know I'm independent. I know I can be a bitch sometimes. I know I'm nice.
So don't tell me all of those anymore unless I really need it cause it'll be like kind of stating the obvious.

BUT.
No one will listen anyway. And I don't expect anyone to.
Because no one will remember. No one bothers to look and care.

Only a few people do. And forever will.
Here are the people I love.. and I realized that truly care. All this time.

1) Christine 
God. I thank God you were born. And I really thank God that he allowed you to come into my life and for mine to be in yours. You're pretty and you probably don't know it yet. You're secretive, mysterious and trustable. You're amazing. You understand my ways perfectly.Like in those stories where bffs stick together and know what the other is going to do every time? Yeah just like that. You're the perfect friend. And the only thing I hope to improve between us is my trust for you.

2) Serene
Haha. Wow. Yeah. I didn't know it too. Maybe I'm not one of those important friend of yours to you. Not the first in the list anyway. And we don't spend too much time together. BUT. You care for me. And I don't even have to ask you. I know already. When I have a problem, one of the few people I feel safe telling to is you. I know you've got problems. A lot of them and I know I can't help.. but I hope you know I'll always be here for you.

3) Zhi
I knew this a long time ago and even though this friendship doesn't seem strong from the outside, it is on the inside. And we both know it don't we? :) You're beautiful even though you always deny it and you have a charm that not many people have. You're kind of a genius and really funny. Thank you for listening to me when I'm bitchy and for lending me your shoulder when I cry. I really appreciate them.

4) Megan
I know we don't talk much.. and well, not really, anyway... But I can't help but feel close to you. Attracted to you? (Don't worry I'm not lesbo) I don't know why you always have so many problems and you don't think you're pretty and you think you're dumb and everything. But what I think: You're pretty, smart, cool, talented. You have a voice that can sing. And I believe you have a charm that only the people who are close enough to you can see , that is probably why you feel so unappreciated. Think positive more often and look at things on its brighter side. You'll feel a whole lot better <3

5) Cherie
Are we distant? I don't know. I hope not. But you're really nice. And sweet. And pretty. Haha. Funny how we all don't think ourselves are pretty but others think we are, right? You're REALLY smart too. I feel quite unimportant to you but it doesn't matter. Because the chemistry is what makes it important. I hope we'll get closer soon :) (with our sleepover and all)

I love you guys all the same. I don't know how else I can express this feeling. I can't express it in a better way than this ... I have this thankful feeling in my heart. I really do.

I pray that your lives will be blessed with success, courage, purity and last but not least, BEAUTY .

Boys Are Mean

Hey girls.
I bet you agree with me on this.
Most of you, anyways.

Cause guys all think they are better than we are. They think that they can do everything better than we will ever be able to. What. Have they never heard of feminism?
Hello?

Ish. They never understand.
I don't blame them.
The question is: Why are they naturally mean?

And heeeyyy PMR is tomorrow!! :D
I'm up for it.
I totally am. I'm almost 90% confident of my ability,
I hope I can score well for this 'puny' exam in one's education life.
Well to me, its important. To be able to look back and gain confidence from it to do well in other important exams; that's important.

I love you guys out there.
But you know what?
BOYS don't know how to treat GIRLS.
They think its totally cool to gay around.
To me, it totally turns me off. (Yes its an irreversible switch)

So.. sucks to be them.
Yes my self-esteem is back girls.
And very soon, Imma be ready to rock :)

Smiles and Laughter

What every girl would want?
Natural beauty.
A perfect smile.
A beautiful laugh.
A sing-song voice.
A caring friend.
Love.

Who cares if you get the worst grades if there's a friend there ready to care and cheer you up and when you have all the good attention you would ever want? Not to mention the beauty.
Who cares if you look ugly when you cry when everyone will care for you?
NO?
Yes, no.

That's every girl's dream.
To be cared for.
And honestly, we all don't and will probably never reach the full potential of the dream.

But we're getting there and that's all that matters.
So keep smiling.
And keep laughing.
And always try to be happy.
Because there's always a finishing line for life.

The Reason of It All

I can't believe I forgot for a moment there.
The reason of why I had moved on from my pains and sufferings.
That God was and always will be right next to me.
No matter what.
Yes I sound so old-fashioned and foolish for believing in Christianity like that.
But I believe God REALLY does exist.
And more than anything, he loves me and everyone else for who they really are.

And when I forgot about that,
I actually went though the same thing again.
So stupid for making the same mistake twice.

So here again. I want to clarify my actions and feelings for real.
I absolutely LOVE my friends.
I LOVE my family too.
And I EXTRA EXTRA LOVE LOVE LOVE God.

I thank God that I'm still here breathing, unharmed in any way, and alive until this day.
For bringing loved ones into my life and not taking them away.
For being there for me all the time when I'm down.

You can insult me then. Go ahead. For being such a silly fool. For believing in such a religion so easily.
But I put my foot down long ago.
I believe in this holy God. This loving father. This devoted teacher.

And our relationship will be the only relationship I have that will never be broken.

He Is So Scary

Okay I mean no offense to anyone here and I'd like to tell you this first because I know that the person I'm gonna talk about will NEVER come here.
And... yeah. Its gonna be a pretty mean post.

Let's start off with this:
THIS GUY IS... weird.
Okay. We never even met before. As in, we don't even know each other.
The only time we talked is on facebook...
and yeah. That's pretty much it.
But he likes me.

He likes me.
He LIKES me?
HE likes ME?
....
....
...
...

I was speechless.
Because I never thought of him that way.
And ever since then, I never really replied to his chats =.=
Cuz it was just waaayy too creepy.
And he posts all this romantic status on his wall and it really doesn't help my situation at all.
Of course, I know its directed to me because I've asked him before and..
well... yeah, you know what happened.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH THIS CREEPO.
Honestly.
Just when I thought he gave up, he comes back again =.=
And saying stuff like 'I don't wanna let you go'... or, 'I feel stupid to give you up without a fight...'

Its disgusting. Revolting.
Eugh. Yuck. Ew.

I feel mean. Why? Because
1) I'm a racist. Yup that's right. I can't stand it when guys of.. THAT race likes me..
2) I really don't reply to him lol. At all. Only at rare times when I feel extremely high then yes.
3) I treat him quite.. badly. I kinda ignore him even if I DO talk to him.

IN CONCLUSION.
ITS REALLY CREEPY.
I JUST WANNA TELL HIM TO SCREW OFF.
But I'm too kind to do that. Not to mention gentle.
How in the world can I tell him off? Sigh..

Nothing Left But Me

I don't understand a lot of everything.
But that doesn't mean I need to, right?
I don't have to. Because some things are meant to be kept secret after all.

I thought I had many friends and people who would support me for a moment there.
But I was just deluding myself. I just realized that.
I really am slow. Am I growing old too soon?

When suddenly no one was there to comfort me, that was when I realized that I was in a sort of dream.
That in reality: No one cares at all.
Maybe if I suffered I dunno... cancer, or heart attack or something stupid... or maybe I was paralyzed.
Then just MAYBE they would worry.
Only for a little while.
Then they'll forget about it the next morning as if nothing had just happened.
And knowing that I've got a sickness, they are ashamed.
And will not talk to me. Or maybe even look at me.

See? That's how much they care for me.
Touching, isn't it?

So I decided that from now on I'm living on my own.
I live for myself and of course - for the peace of the world.
Which means I must act right and bring about the right consequences.
So nothing terrible happens and I get a good life.

I trust no one.
Love no one (except for my family)
And definitely, I'll never be silly and take part in something stupid which will end up bringing much disadvantage to me.

Its true.
I'm selfish. And I wonder who made me become that way.
But just so you know, I'm still nice.
Somehow, I can never fully NOT trust someone.
I can never fully NOT love someone either.

I wonder what this means..
But then again, I don't have to understand.
Cause some things are just meant to be kept secret.

I'm Crazy, But That's Just Who I Am

Yeah. So.. basically, the story of my life went like this:
In primary school, I was often mentally bashed by the popular creeps.
So I let that mental stress out on my other friends by using my friend to physically bash them.
Which means.. I don't do it. I tell others to do it.
Yeah.
But all the mental bashing took a toll on my mental sanity.
And therefore, with that mind in set,
I moved on to secondary school.

Being the dumb freak I was,
I tried making friends with every single person.
And ended up hurting others in the process as well as.. hurting myself. A LOT.
So from there onwards, I changed.
I became well... this me. The current me.
How do I say it?

I still have that violence from my primary school days inside of me.
I often dream of people dying or murdered or tortured or ACCIDENTALLY getting their body parts chopped off. Or even ripped apart.
Like last night.

Okay. Yeah I know that's scary.
That's the most bizarre part of Rachel.

BUT. What's awesome about her?
She has a really kind and forgiving heart. Although she isn't exactly a beauty queen.
Nor a candidate for any beauty pageant.
She lets things go. And move on.

And that's what's so great about her. And the best thing about her is that she can be a really great friend.
The kind that might just sacrifice her pride to protect her friend's.
But. Well, too bad. She hasn't found that perfect friend to sacrifice even a breath for.

I have like, two extreme sides to me. And.. I don't think much people know that.
Except for my family maybe.. and Megan (a little) and Cherie and Zhi En and Christine...
Well anyway, most people only know my good side and that shows how much they don't deserve me.
Only and allow me to emphasize-- ONLY people who know my violent side and accepts it and tolerates it with a true and loving heart will be a true friend.

That's right.
I'm crazy. Crazy enough to dream that a emo punk-ish girl who was blending herself some juice lost control of the machine and it just whirled around, the plug was pulled out of its socket and the slicing thingies cut her head off from the rest of her body and her friends had to dump her head in a plastic bag. And it was bloody.
And I'm also crazy enough to survive anything that anyone throws at me and yet whine about it to some friend that probably doesn't care as much as I think she does.
And I'm crazy enough to cry tears for people who probably don't give a damn about me.
And I'm crazy enough to forgive a person instantly when that person has caused a great deal of damage on my mental status.

Yes. I'm crazy.
Is there something wrong about it?
Want to send me to the mental hospital?
Well go ahead.
But you're paying all the fees.

A Hurt Heart

Life IS this hard after all.
I mean, its supposed to be easy.. and maybe I'm just complicating things
But I dare say this isn't wholly my fault.

I don't understand anyone for anything anymore.
I'm always so ready to be devoted, and to give anything or anyone my best shot.
But no one accepts that.
And even if they do, its only to take advantage of me.

Maybe that's why I've learned to appreciate my parents more lately.
Because they gave me life, shelter, food, clothes, education, anything I want and most importantly love.
TRUE love.
That's what they have given me and will always do.

But there's an awfully true saying that for imperfect beings like us humans,
we can never live without friends.
I understand that.
I try not to believe that but my heart denies my mind.

So where are these 'friends'?
I want to meet my true friend. The only friend who would understand me for who I really am.
Who'd feel like crying when I cry.
Who'll lend me her shoulder when I'm upset.
Who'd be able to relate to me no matter what.
Who truly loves me with all her heart.

My heart is hurt.
I am an idiot.
I'm not even sure that I can believe that such a friend exists for me anymore.
I'm stupid enough to fall for the same mistake twice. Once at age of 8. Another at the age of 13.
Ha. I wonder if it'll happen at 18 again?

My level of idiocy is almost hilarious.
Now not only am I hurt because of one friend, I'm hurt because of all.
To the extent that there's not even one friend left that I can run to.
And I'm tired of trying so hard.
I'm still human you know?

I'm tired of trying to hint to my friends that I really do need to hear comforting words from them when I'm upset, that I hate it when people think I'm scary and when people ignore me when I'm sad or crying.
I'm tired of crying because no one gives a damn about my sadness and even when I DO cry, no one still cares.
I'm like shit. Really .. shit.

I hide it.
I hide it and that's why some people think I'm pretty.
Whereas others who are less of actors, trample on me and step all over me after getting what they want from me.
Am I only this type of person after all?
A disposable toy?

Lost in Trust

I don't know anything about friendship anymore.
I suddenly feel like a useless puppet again.
An amateur starting anew.

Why? Why do people make things so complicated?
Why do they have to go out of the way to make things complex?
Why can't everything just be simple and nice?
Why do they have to hurt when they can please?
Why do I cry when I can smile?
Why do they betray when they can be loyal?

I don't get it.
Its so complicated.
This world is so complicated.
Compare life to my textbooks, I'd rather read the textbooks all over again from page 1.
They are so much easier.

I don't know who to trust anymore.
My best friend is just a simple close friend. I know that now.
My close friend is my best friend who does not pay much attention to me.
My other best friend became my close friend and now is only a friend who I can never relate to.
And my last best friend disappointed me. I don't even know who she is now.

Who am I anyway?
Does anyone even truly care about me?
Is it worth it, putting my trust in even one person?
Where are you God?
Tell me.
Is it only you that I can trust?
Can I not trust the other creations you made?

I'm hurt and beyond disappointed.
I need Your presence.
I need Your presence in someone else for me.
I can't go on like this.
I need You.

Pissed

Hey. Its me. I'm not Rachox today i'm just Rachel.
So I won't go ':D' or 'HEYYY!!!' or 'lol'.
Its just me and if you don't like it then f*** off for all I care.

Just cause I haven't been showing my sad side lately,
does it mean this part of me doesn't exist anymore?
Just because I haven't been crying lately,
does that mean I'm happy?

I'm not being a baby and whining all at once just cause I got 34 for english paper 1.
I mean what the f***? Are you my friend or not?
What happened to sticking together?
What happened to knowing me? Inside and out?

So what?
I know you avoided me cause you're afraid.
But, hell, did you think that I would ever lash out at you?
You're my BFF for f***'s sake.
The only thing that could ever come close to that is venting out at you.
I would NEVER get mad at you I swear.
And you should know that by now.

You should know too that when I'm depressed, I absolutely LOVE it when people comfort me and absolutely HATE it when people avoid me.
You should f***king know that?
I can't believe you.
You made me more upset.
I don't even know what to say anymore. I'm f***king speechless.

I CAN'T BELIEVE THE ONLY ONE WHO GAVE A DAMN WAS CHERIE.

God bless her.

F*** everyone else.

Overcoming Cowardice

Will you stop being a coward?
Can you stop hiding yourself in that black box, take the challenge, get your lazy ass off that couch and start doing SOMETHING to change your life for the better?

You know, whether you believe in God or not,
its evident that we always have a choice.
We can choose to live with frowns on our faces, or with smiles.
We can die happy, or die disappointed, aggravated, lonely, remorseful, regretful.

Honestly, I'm tired of you limping around like an abandoned puppy,
because you're not.
You're human. You have all the strength you need to have,
you're obviously good-looking enough.
And you obviously have the talent. Although you might not know it yet,
but who cares?
Its still there.
And you still have plenty of time to figure that out.

You CAN achieve ANYTHING if you BELIEVE.
Why do you give up so easily?
Why are you not able to tear off your armor and face challenges as your own person?
Why can't you act without being spoon-fed?
Why must you whine when the tiniest of problems appear?

Why can't you believe?
If you have a solid reason,
then maybe its excusable.
But its never ACCEPTABLE because you always have the other choice.
CHOOSE TO LIVE A HAPPY LIFE.

I don't say this because of pity,
or because I want to gain your attention,
or because I wanna be known,
neither because I want to nag and give you hypocritical advice.
I said it because I've done it and

HELL YEAH. You know what?
It felt awesome.
And I still feel great now.
Don't hide in there anymore.
Come on out from the dark and the cold.
The warm sunshine is waiting for you.

I Love ... Cherie

Cherie the mistress of deception.
Cherie the cute panda-like gal.
Cherie the awesome.
Cherie the genius.

I admit I didn't really like you at first glance.
But that's just my prejudice and me being biased.
I actually really like you and wanna know you.

So...
yeah.

You're really smart for some reason and I don't know why.
Maybe you're born that way (which would be the most accurate guess)
Or maybe you've worked really hard to come this far.
I dunno. You haven't told me much yet.
Or maybe NOT 'yet'. Maybe you might never tell me.

I always feel that there's this distance between us that's just incomprehensible.
Its always there.
I think its because you're still keeping some secrets from me :(
Well, Megan feels that way sometimes too, but you're a little worse xD

ANYHOO. You're really nice and have a cute character and a sweet personality.
And you're smart. And good at deceiving people.
Which can be both bad and good o3o

I hope I can get rid of the distance between us soon.
I don't want to feel like strangers around my friends.
Especially my close friends like megan and you :)
Truth is, I only feel that way around you two.
I wonder why...

NAH. I still love you.
Have a good life cherie.
And I hope one day you can really smile.
A smile that comes from the depths of your heart.

--rachel

I Love ... Krystal

Krystal the pretty nerd :D
Krystal the unique art-crafter.
Krystal the strong teenage girl.
Krystal the courageous.

I don't know what to say,
you're just so different from other people.
So unique.
You're not like the other girls (like me)
Who'd always care about how they'd look, what others think about them half the time
How they should act at certain places at a certain time.
YOU DON'T CARE about all that bullshit.

You're just.. YOU.
You stand out from the rest because you do what you know is right even when others criticize you.
You're amazing like that. And maybe that's why the school appointed you as prefect.
I'm kinda jealous you know?
I wanna be fearless and stand up for myself too.
But I always fall away and I really can't help that.
Sigh.

And you're not only good in art, you're even better in crafting!
You have that natural ability to just think of something random and confidently put them into work.
And even if you didn't give much thought about it, it'll still end up pretty and good to look at.
Unlike my work of course. Pfft.

You have a few family problems... like, real ones..
but you face them so bravely and I sometimes even forget that you have those problems.
You're always smiling and keeping your head up and being your own person.
Keep it up.
Never fall away, got it? Don't be like the others cause you're prefect just the way you are :)

- your close friend, rachel

I LOVE ... Christine

I'm not exactly in the mood today but I guess I'll still do it ...coz... KARA's MV for "STEP" is out and Hara looked so freakin hot in it! And so does Nicole!! Okay.. back to the topic.

Christine the never-giver-upper.

Christine the calm.

Christine the comfy friend.

Christine the shy cutie.

Christine the unknown princess.

Yeah Christine will probably never ever come here in say, forever.

But I'm still gonna blog about her.

Coz I love her.

She's the one and only friend I've TOTALLY opened up to.

100%.

And the best thing about her is that she's so understanding and so quick to catch on.

She got the perfect AVERAGE life that I want.

I want my family life (especially) to be like hers.

She has two younger sisters who are (OKAY I admit) a little annoying.

But when they have fun, they REALLY do.

I only have an elder sister who's a little bipolar.

Sometimes she gets pissed off really quick and easily.

And other times she WANTS your bloody attention.

Its so annoying and cruel and misleading.

Sigh.

Christine, you probably hate it when I call you cute,

but you really are.

Not the annoying/teasing way. The REAL cute.

As in adorable cute :)

You are -- allow me to emphasize-- the STRONGEST teenager I have ever met. Emotionally wise.

You are ALMOST never shaken. You're so stable and so strong.

You're like a princess in that way.

So carefree and at the same time careful and take into account every thing that you do.

You don't get mad easily. You are so good at controlling your emotions.

And another best thing about you is that when I just vent to you with all my cusses and my whinings and complains,

you hardly said a thing to me.

Not because you didn't care. Not because you didn't like that side of me.

But because you don't want to say something that'll make me even more mad or trigger another nerve in me.

You understand every single one of my habits and you practically already MEMORIZED them.

You know them like their at the back of your hand.

And I know you the same way too.

I hope that in the future, even if we have parted ways, we will still keep in contact.

Cause that's just how much I love you.

-currently your utmost dearest friend, rachel

I LOVE ... my neko-chan :D

Hey! This is my um second I LOVE.

My neko chan is just so cute sometimes 8D (hope she doesn't see this post anytime soon though hehe)

Zhi En the beautiful.

Zhi En the mysterious cat.

Zhi En the genius.

Zhi En the leader.

Zhi En the blind beauty.

Zhi En the natural.

I really didn't think you were beautiful before.. until of late.

Maybe I didn't like you very much for one moment? :P (it has past anyway)

Yeah you're funny, and cute, and smart, and mysterious, and attractive and really capable :)

Maybe you were just born that way? Tee hee.

But you know you don't always have to hide everything.

I know you don't want me to get hurt or to get involved at all.

But just know that I'm always here.

And don't ever get insecure about your looks coz you're looking just fine.

And you'll grow to look even more fine in the future.

Don't hate the image you see of yourself.

Because I know I like that image.

And of course the original you.

I can almost imagining a black cloth covering your view now.

Its totally blocking you from seeing the bright side to most of the things.

And its making you think deep dark thoughts.

Shielding yourself from the rest of the world.

Even I can't get through to you.

I know I can't now.

Sigh. I feel so useless sometimes.

I'm such a quiet and shy person and I really hate myself too sometimes.

And I can't even help you much.

Which just adds to that, really. Sigh.

No matter how much you deny it,

I still believe you're born a genius. Or a leader.

Either.

You're special and I don't know if it seems that way to only me or to others too.

I know sometimes you know that too, so... don't let it get over your head okay? :)

-love rachel

I LOVE ... Megan :)

Yes I'm gonna have lots of 'I LOVE's soon

and I just thought I'd..

..kick it off with Megan!

Megan with the hidden beauty.

Megan the budding flower.

Megan with the hidden talent.

Megan the cutie.

Megan the mysterious.

Megan the sexy hottie.

Hey Megan! I know you're one of em people who visit my blog often.

Thanks and I love you so so so much :)

I don't know how and why I didn't get to know you sooner.

I don't know why I can't seem to converse with you properly in real life.

And I know I am going to soon :)

I really wanna open up to you and I don't want you to misunderstand my sometimes quiet attitude for being cold to you.

I REALLY REALLY WANNA TALK TO YOU.

I just want you to understand that it takes Phui Yen a long time to get to know someone and be her true self with that person.

And I'm slowly getting there. I just know it.

Those things I said about you up there? It wasn't just for flattery.

I'm being truthful :)

Maybe you can't see it. But others really can.

And maybe you can't see it now, but you don't only have a lot of friends, you have that handful of friends who really care and want to know you better. A friend like me :)

I wanna get to know you better but I'm afraid of the people you talk to.

Not afraid. Hm.. what's the word?

Shy?

ESPECIALLY at the canteen table. Tee hee. Yes I finally admitted that to you.

You're a true budding flower.

So pretty and so talented but just waiting to bloom to its fullest until you can see the own naturally pretty fruits that you bear.

You're sexy and beautiful but I really don't know if you can see that now.

Maybe sometime in the future when you've totally lost your baby fats (which is quite little now already actually, from the looks of it, on your face anyway <3)

I don't know why but you're ALWAYS SO CUTE. Haha.

Yes. You are terribly clumsy and forgetful and sometimes a slow learner.

But that just makes you that much cuter :D

You've got a hidden talent and I don't know what it is.

Maybe its always what you've dreamed of... singing.

Or maybe its something else.

Take your time figuring it out. Talk to me about it too while you're at it ^^

I love you Megan and I'm sick of saying 'I-don't-know-why's

so I'm gonna say that maybe God is telling me something.

Or maybe fate is setting in.

I wanna be your like, close friend.

I want to be able to lend you my shoulder to cry on.

I want to share my secrets with you.

And more than anything else, I wanna laugh with you. And smile :)

P.S I can't wait for our sleepover bash! ( if its gonna work out anyway...) and shopping day! (if thats gonna work out too...) love ya, muacckkss~

Poster for first chapter of my story.. AND the 2nd.. AND the 8th. tee hee.(forget it its just a big spam for my story posters LMAO coz i need the urls for putting it up on my story so... yeah)

Its kinda plain and boring but its my first time nevertheless ._.

http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/72186/angel-and-devil-of-love-kimbum-minho-minyoung-sandarapark

Check it out please~ Kamsahamnida~

Comment too, or subscribe :D

They're all loved!

Okay.

Now back to studying.. >3>

Some Things Can Never Be Undone

Some of the things I've done that really hurt other people.

I really wanna just take those back.

I feel like the bad guy sometimes.

I know I'll never be forgiven.

But I just want you to know I'm sorry.

If I'd suddenly PMS-ed on you one day out of the blue.

If I'd ignored you suddenly and not talk to you for the entire day. Week. Or sometimes even a month. (yes that's how long I can hold a grudge for)

If I'd done some mean things to you like outrightly telling you that you're a b!tch or whatnot.

Telling you to say sorry when it was not entirely your fault.

FOR BEING AN ATTENTION WHORE. AND A B!ITCH. AND A LOSER.

I'M SO SORRY.

You probably know who I'm talking about.

If you don't then maybe you'd like to take this as a message to yourself too.

If I'd done anything to you, I now sincerely apologize.

My childish ways.

I promise to never let them run so freely anymore.

I hate that part of me.

I hope you see my sincerity.

I hope that if you'll not forgive me, then please understand how sorry I am.

I know things between us will never go back to the way they were.

When you trusted me more than you trusted God Himself.

I feel regret every time.

I thank you too, because now you've taught me a lesson.

It took me a whole freaking year to finally accept that it was also my fault for this rift that separates us.

I learn to be humble and always blame myself first, not anyone else. Not even anyTHING else.

Thank you. And above all else,

Sorry.

I Need You

Yup. YOU.

I need the blessings D:

I really can't concentrate on studying and the test is on next monday!

Please wish me luck or give me your blessings.

I REALLY REALLY need them.

Thanks :3

Over You

I've got to be independent now. Imma big gurl X)

I can't afford to go astray like this anymore.

Its time I gave up on this one-sided crush, don't you think?

You aren't really handsome/cute/hot/sexy/sweet in the first place.

Now I sit here, thinking how I even fell for you.

I laugh.

I can't seem to find the time when this feeling sparked.

A song to fit with my mood now : Miss $ & Block B (remix) - Over

YEP. I like Block-B. tee hee. but b2st is still my favourite :>

You are my first crush. No, scratch that. You WERE my first crush.

And I really thank you for that.

But there is nothing much left for me to say.

It felt good while it lasted.

But now its over.

I'm glad.

That I'm over you.

The Troubles in Me

Sigh. Welcome to my life.

I know I haven't been updating much recently. I'm sorry :(

I just don't seem to have any inspiration left in me like what I had one or two years ago.

Main reason? Nothing much seems to be going on in my life recently.

BUT its not like I want anything to happen either coz it gets troublesome when it does...

ANYWAY the main troubles I'm facing right now is:

1) Exam is like TWO freaking weeks away and I'm not studying yet.

2) The muscles from my shoulders all the way to the base of my feet HURTS. Ouch.

3) I think I like someone. But I'm not really sure... and he isn't replying me.. or even talking to me at all.

4) I feel awkward around my dad lately.

5) I'm procrastinate too much.

Yeap. Yeah, that's it.

Haha just an update on my life.

I promise the next post will be much more interesting ^^

-love Rachel

Dreams Can Come True

I hate you.

I hate you for making me feel this way.

When I feel like I know I finally have the strength to push you away,

you talk to me, and suddenly I don't hate you anymore.

Suddenly, it feels like I'M the one who's in the wrong.

Then i take it back.

And its like i can never get mad at you when you're around.

But when you're gone, I get so mad I can't contain it.

I HAVE TO TELL SOMEONE. vent it out.

Then that someone that I tell will definitely tell someone else about it ( FOR SURE. I can assure you.)

Doesn't matter if she/he's my best friend. the news will still spread.

Then you find out about it.

Then I feel ashamed.

But I never tell anyone of this shame.

Then you still go on like nothing happened.

And somehow, that hurts me even more.

Why?

I HATE YOU.

You complicate my life.

Sigh. I wish I'd never fallen for you.

Pretend

I've decided.

I'm gonna pretend again.

And this time, its gonna last.

I'm not gonna change my mind.

So don't you dare try.

SIGH.

Now I have to choose between Sempurna and Wesley.

Seriously. Sempurna = Not-so-good school but I don't wanna leave my friends.

Wesley = Awesome 5 star school and if I manage to get in, I might even have a 50% discount on my college fees. (Wesley's College that is)

ISHH. Where should I go?

Should I stay? Should I go?

I need help! :(

Lost and Confused

Am I wrong?

To deny this feeling?

I keep telling myself that I don't like you.

that you're just a passerby. A stranger.

But in reality, I really I can't ignore you.

I lie to everyone around me that even when they catch me looking at you,

it means that I feel pissed at you or something, but I'M NOT.

... Evidence?

Hell yeah I got evidence.

I couldn't even tell every single one of my close buddies that I don't like you anymore.

Some of them still thinks I do.

Which, really, I still do.

BUT YEAH I DIDN'T TELL ALL OF THEM.

Sigh. What happens now? What should I do?

Should I continue acting like nothing's happened?

Should I continue denying this fact?

Should I speak up?

Should I tell you... the real reason why I ignore you?

I know you most probably don't like me. But my heart won't accept it.

And maybe that's why I'm ignoring you.

Because I wanna get rid of this feeling.

So that I won't have to go on liking you.

So that you won't ever have to find out that I did like you.

So I won't have to hear you say "I'm sorry. But.. I don't feel the same."

..... I don't know what to do.

OH YEAH BABY.

Yeah, the header picture has changed!!

And new header picture means new confidence!

New header picture means renewal of my spirit! :D

And now B2ST takes over!!

MY ONE AND ONLY FAV KOREAN BOY BAND.

Goodbye IU , hello B2st :)

Anyway. I'm so awesomely ready for life.

Come on babe. Shove anything at me with all you've got.

I'm not afraid.

I've my ONLY best friend with me 24/7.

What is there for me to be afraid of?

Dear life,

I dont even know if you're actually a maze,

or a game.

Or a puzzle to solve.

But one thing I can be sure of:

you're meant to be lived in.

And I don't want to live in disappointment or sadness.

I don't want to spend my life emo-ing.

I'm SO going out there.

And give everything my best shot.

I don't care if I fail.

I don't care because I know there's always a chance to get back up again.

Everyone have chances to redeem themselves as long as they live.

And I'm not gonna waste any time.

PMR. I might hate you,

but it doesn't mean I'm gonna fail on you.

I'm gonna PASS you,

with FLYING colours.

And you ain't got nothing to say about that <3

Oh, and also, good luck to anyone who reads this post.

To boys: exams, school, life, sports, attitude.

to girls: life, emotions, monthly moods,school, shopping, exams, AND your crushes.

Never give up.

EVER.

As If It Wasn't Enough

As if it wasn't enough that I just got over my crush,

as if it wasn't enough that my sister irritated me

that my mum was rushing me.

That no one really cared about me at school today.

That today was a bad hair day, a day when I suddenly have low self-confidence.

My dad who's usually working overseas is home and he just yelled at me.

Fuck yeah.

How amazing the feeling was.

I was speechless.

There was a moment of silence. But I knew what I had to do.

I apologized. For something I know I did wrong but don't deserve to be yelled at for it.

Its crazy.

I'm SO heartbroken.

Coz my sister and mum are always bullying me.

Not exactly bullying. More like.. always siding each other when a problem surfaces.

Then I get blamed for it.

I ALWAYS GET THE BLAME.

Fuck numerology.

It says my dad will help me when my mum and sister 'gang bangs' me.

Well.

It didn't work.

In fact,

ALL THREE OF THEM WERE AGAINST ME.

Now I finally see it.

In this family, I'm always the lone ranger.

No one ever takes my side.

Every thing gets directed at me. Never good stuff.

Always the bad ones.

And I know I can't say anything to that.

Fuck. I mean if a simple show of temper could piss my dad off like that,

if I told him that neither of them are ever on my side,

I don't think I'll be there to watch the next sunSET. (its 5 pm now)

Being the youngest might always seem to be a benefit to all elder siblings out there,

but in my family,

it effing isn't.

Lucky for me, I'm always ready. With a few layers of defence around my heart.

Or my eyes would have been puffy by now.

I hate my family life.

And right now, even the beginning of my love life.

My friends life.

My.. everything.

I can't be myself around my friends,

Now I can't even be myself around my FAMILY.

I thought family were supposed to be the bestest friends you'll ever have.

Now I know.

That maybe.

I was wrong.

I Don't Know

My life is getting a little messed up again D:

Okay so here's the deal.

SOME EFFIN PERSON WHO MUST'VE READ MY BLOG OR ALREADY KNOWS THAT I LIKE 'HIM' TOLD 'HIM' himself.

OR HE COULD'VE GUESSED HIMSELF.

But it would so not make sense because he sounds so super duper confident about it.

He knows.

HE KNOWS I like him.

F***.

okay. so that's one complication.

And the other is my studies. Trials is only ... ONE WEEK away.

And I'm not even close to ready.

How will I face the exams?

I've practically the least time ever. There's nothing GOOD I can pull off now.

SIGHHHH

Okay. Back on the first complication.

I don't know how I'm supposed to react.

Should I ignore him? and pretend like we never even knew each other?

OR should I pretend like I never knew he knows about my feelings and give up on him at the same time and be my own person?

Honestly speaking, I think the second one is better. Yeah?

YEAH. TOTALLY.

Go me.

Sigh. I feel so deprived of my supposedly peak of teenage life.

I'm suffering.
And the only thing I'm waiting for now is the end of PMR.

For The First Time~

I spent so much money for a measly birthday gift for a 'friend' this year.

For the first time. Hehe. And I didn't even feel bad that I did that

Instead, I feel great!

Like, yay! I bought him/her a present and I know he/she's gonna love it! (Though its not their favourite color but still...)

Sighs.

Fine.

I'll tell you nervous anticipating readers.

I bought a gift for my crush. AND I HONESTLY HOPE HE NEVER EVER GOES TO MY BLOG OR I WILL BE DEAD.

Hehe. Cause he'll so totally know that its him when he reads this.

Is this what falling in love for the first time feels like?

It feels great =)

But I'm not a fool. I know it won't last forever.

The signs are already showing.

I get jealous when I see another girl with you.

I feel so happy when you show the tiniest bit of a smile.

I feel bad when you look down.

I wanna know how holding your hand would feel like...

I wanna know how your voice would sound like.

I sound like a total creep.

A psycho perhaps.

But that's what love did to me.

And I like it.

A lot ♥

I know

I know it hurts. And its painful and your heart's been broken so many times.

But you always have to get back up again.

Because that's what life's all about.

When I see you sad, I get sad too.

When you cry, I feel like crying too.

You should know by now, how precious you are to me.

And I would give my life away just to see you eternally happy.