Waiting With You

Wow. I've just realized I have TONS of things I'm just waiting for to happen.

Things that aren't controllable. You know?

Like when you get sick and stuff like that... except, i don't wanna get sick lol.

okay here's my wishlist.

1) get my new up-to-date phone! xD

2) meet my ideal friend.

3) know what/who i wanna be in the future.

4) to fall in love (to REALLY fall in love, that is)

5) to see my sister drive xD (haha that would be splendid. honest.)

6) earn enough money to be able to buy my own stuff and not burden my parents. especially my dad.

7) waiting DESPERATELY for someone to come up to me and say 'you're beautiful' with a sincere heart.

8) God to give me courage to truly stand up for what's right.

9) for my friends/ close friends/ un-close friends/ bffs to realize that hey, rachel/phuiyen/rachox is here for me!

10) to find someone someday that would acknowledge my presence.

11) someone who would think of me when they face their toughest times.

12) to face a crisis and seeking help from God.

God.

I sound so spiritual/emotional/silly in my wishlist eh?

I guess, summing it all up, I just want a nice friend and probably a guy who'd be sweet enough to tell me 'i'm beautiful', and get a job of my own to buy the things I want and make my parents proud by knowing who i wanna be in the near future.

Its really hard. This game. Called life.

But there's a challenge.

We have to live through it at the max! Right?

And there would be twist and turns and hurdles and obstacles and traps and hindrances everywhere.

But that wouldn't change the fact that there IS a destination.

So work your way through it . with a smile =)

and know that whoever you are that's reading this (if you're my friend)

I'm with you ALL THE WAY ♥

Who Are You, Really?

yeah, okay. I know alright? My blog is boring and there are not much pictures and not much followers and useless shout outs and no music.

But hey. This is still a blog xD

Anyway. The big question today: Who Are You?

Sometimes you think about it, and you really find yourself lost.

You know your name, you know where you live, you know what your occupation is, you know what others think about you.

But WHO ARE YOU?

Let me tell you who you are if you really don't know.

1) You're human.

2) You're either a girl or a guy.

3) You're this tiny little thing that stands on the surface of the Earth.

4) You're a character in this place we call WORLD.

5) You are your own person. Eff what others think of you. you are you.

6) Yes, you might be a side character in the world's point of view. But in YOUR life, its YOUR own story, thus why this whole world belongs to YOU. And that's why YOU're the main character.

who cares if you're a nerd? who cares if you suck so bad that no one wants to talk to you?

to hell with that.

who cares if you're an ungrateful popular brat that still craves for more?

F*** that.

You're the main character.

which means you always have a choice.

do you want to be a good person? or a bad person?

to you want to the right thing? or slack and do the wrong?

Its your choice.

Cause THIS IS YOUR LIFE. YOUR WORLD. YOUR STORY.

your ending is in your hands. period.

I Feel Old

Haha you can ignore the kelefeh pic above if you hate having to even look at stupid things.

LOL yes I do.

Maybe its coz I HAVE TONS OF WHITE HAIR ALREADY. (fyi, im 15)

Maybe its also coz I'M BECOMING REALLY FORGETFUL

Hm... and I THINK OF THE PAST A LOT LATELY.

*sighs*

I feel like an old granny.

Too bad I'm too hot to be one.

HAHA.

That's self-confidence there not arrogance xD

Entrepreneur's Day is really really near! And not to mention its also Report Card day on that day.

OMG i miss being just a member of the club!

Now that I'm the Vice President, I have like extra work to do and you all know how lazy I really am *winks winks*

AWWWWHHHH

I have to make sure we don't spend over the budget,

gain some profit. (at LEAST some, mind you)

and write it down on a piece of paper and the deadline to pass it up is very close!

Wish me luck, I'm really gonna need it!

And let's all hope I don't age faster than a normal person my age would okay?

CHEERS~!

Just Realized Something

I haven't posted about the St.John Camp '11! =D

Hell yeah~!!

I have not felt like my own person since forever!

and. and. and. and. and.

*uhm. cat got your tongue much?*

*oh shut up!*

AND!!!!! the camp allowed it to happen. thank God for that.

really.

I've been such a naughty girl and He still blesses me like this.

My heart is touched once again.

*not like it doesn't happen everyday. pfft*

* oh conscience, have i told you to shut up already?*

*OH YES. I DID.*

it was awesome and it was truly a once-in-a-lifetime experience!

well, other than the hot guys that is.....

LOL nvr mind about that.

i did many things I would have never thought I'd do. and I ENJOYED it.

Listen to this:

1)I PLAYED WITH MUD.

2)I TALKED TO BOOYYSS =)

3)I GOT SCRATCHED AND BRUISED AND HURT AND WOUNDED AND I DIDN'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT IT.

4)I DID THE COMMANDO CRAWL THINGY THAT HURT ME AND I ENJOYED THAT.

5)I FELT LIKE A TOTAL HOTTIE THERE.

6)I KNEW ONE OF THE INSTRUCTORS CHECKED ME OUT.

(hehehe. pls don't tell crystal wai, she'll like, totally freak out xD )

7)I WAS THE LEADER OF MY TEAM AND WE WON.

8)I ACTED IN A PLAY WHICH SCRIPT I WROTE.

9)MY TEAM TOTALLY HAD TEAMWORK. HANDS DOWN.

10)I WAS AWESOME. period.

AND!!!

I WAS ME =)

Being not in the central of KL just makes me feel so fresh and amazing and renewed.

and I loved every single thing I did there.

even the part when my team have to wash the place almost everyday and I end up doing it all the time while some of the members will slack off and I don't feel like yelling at them because i was having the time of my life there and I didn't want to ruin it

phew. that was a long sentence.

I love you krystal chin, crystal wai, and of course all my BETA teammates ( I can still remember your names so yeah!)

love- yeevon, wenni, zhi xuan, william, ridge, zhi zhen and marcus!

this is something I will absolutely never forget and will stay etched onto my mind until my last breath. (unless I happen to get alzheimer's... you know)

so yeah. God bless every soul out there. AMEN! =)

You Crazy HotA$S

Why must you be so hot??

Why can't I forget you d**mmit >:(

I really have nothing to say.. haha

but I know I haven't updated in a very long time so I'm updating now.

Thanks for visiting my blog.

Pls come again.

I promise the next post will be a lengthy nice smooth one.

-love, rachel

Chinese. School. Boys.

I wanna learn Chinese.

I ADMIT IT.

I feel so handicapped because I can't speak Chinese. Like, all the time.

And it gets especially annoying when there are hot guys right before me but they can't speak English.

AND I CAN"T SPEAK CHINESE.

Someone, help me?

Someone that won't laugh at all the petty mistakes I do when I speak Chinese?

Oooh~

Its like, I always hated the language and now I wanna learn it.

Rachel, where's your pride?

Brrrr

Pride ain't the problem now...

Oh. And also, school's in like 2 days.

DARN IT ALL.

2 days is not a very long time left.

And when I get back to school, I really gotta start studying, huh.

Oh btw, just an add-on,

my hormones are getting to me. Seriously.

I'm starting to think a lot of guys are hot. (well not a lot, only a selected few, but still)

and I wanna get a guy to date.

WHICH IS A VERY WRONG THING TO DO AT A TIME LIKE THIS, MIND YOU.

I should be studying my a$s off and my hormones and addiction to my beloved computer is distracting me.

Sigh.. Ottokae?

The Right Thing To Do

I'm not really sure which I should do.

But I know what is right.

I know I should study.

I know I can ace my tests and be number one.

BUT

I slack.

A LOT.

And I laze too.

A WHOLE LOT more.

So its quite impossible to ace my test don't you think?

Sometimes I keep telling myself that I should sit down on my study desk and study.

But I don't. I can't. I can't concentrate.

Why?

Is my will not strong enough?

I don't want to accept my bad fate.

I want to change it.

But.. am I able to?

I'm not sure anymore.

But somewhere deep down inside of me,

I know I still stand a chance.

Someday, I'll be able to do it.

To build up my strength, courage and focus to study. And also a lot of other important stuffs to.

'SOMEDAY'

When will that be?

Meant To Last?

I think my innocence is starting to fade.

My trust in others are wavering.

And I might be a little more secure,

but I'm less happy now. Less contented.

I used to believe that there are people who are just meant to be together.

To last together.

Doesn't matter if their family, friends, or lovers.

But there are definitely people out there who are capable of trusting each other to the extent that they'd sacrifice anything for the other...

or so I used to think.

I miss being naive.

Don't you?

Life's so easily when you're ignorant and too innocent to even think of the consequences that will come along with your actions.

That you'd go through the pain that follows and still be as strong as ever because you had never anticipated it.

Ignorance is bliss after all.

Now I don't even think that people even last anymore.

We live and die. And its the same for everyone else as well.

Some people come, some people go.

Never in this world can I ever place my trust wholly in anyone or anything.

Because its stupid.

Because there will be much rejection, hurt, pain betrayal and LIES.

And I've had enough.

Better to prevent than to cure..

..right?