Life's Lesson

There are millions of things you learn in life, right?

There are too many.

Some which I know of. Others which I don't know at all.

When I think about the reason of my existence,

I, somehow, feel very nostalgic.

Like I somehow know why I do exist.

Its something else. Not just because 'God created me'.

I know it somehow.. somewhere in my heart.

But. I will never find out.

Because. Why should I want to find that out?

When I haven't even figured out the rest of my life yet?

The simple things.

I complicate simple things.

Its a tendency. I tend do it.

I wonder why...

Maybe I don't like a plain happy-go-lucky life.

I want something to run in my life.

Like how it is with everything else like family, friendship, environment.

I know...

Each and every one of us have our soul mate out there.

And we're all waiting.

Not just in a romantic way, people who are really destined for us.

People who will help us in times of need and really devote themselves to us.

To tell the truth,

In my opinion, I think human beings are really lonely people.

That's why they need friends, family, work, positive emotions.

They can't just.. sit there. And do nothing. Its not right somehow don't you think?

And we take things for granted all the time.

Some might think its annoying or stupid or really just... nonsensical.

But, to me, I think this habit.. is sweet.

It resembles who we are.

That's who we all are. Its the start of something.

And if we can change that,

the seed from the beginning will blossom beautifully in the end.

I feel like.. I don't know.

Not all there.

I'm not... really dedicated to what I'm doing now.

I'm always hesitating and forcing myself to do what is right.

I care too much of what people think about me.

I'm not too confident about my skills, looks and ability.

But, I'm sure,

Someday, when I get the right motivation and determination,

I will start looking forward to the future.

I will stop thinking negative thoughts, do the best I can in whatever I do willingly and devote myself fully to my job( no, not work, to what I'm supposed to do)

I'm not desperate for romantic love.

That can wait.

.. Besides, we haven't spoken in more than 15 days.

It feels like forever.

It wouldn't be a surprise if you're sleeping with some woman now.

Or lazing around in your room enjoying your alcohol.

Or probably, at best, in your office, overloaded with work.

My heart is trembling.

My life is in my own hands.

So is yours.

Think about it.

Is it worth it, being depressed all your life and doing nothing about it?

If you think it is worth it, you've got a big problem there :)

happy day.