Lesson: Not Learned

Remember those days when I used to emo a lot and stuff? :/
No guys I'm not proud of it or anything. I know I mention it a lot, but it doesn't mean I'm boasting that I'm more experienced or something.
I'm not.
In fact, I might just be VERY inexperienced still.

It looks like I haven't learned my lesson since then.
I'm making the same mistakes again.
But for a different person.
Why won't I listen to my conscience?
Why do I always go against the law I created for myself and do things I shouldn't,
only to end up being disappointed and heartbroken? ):

I'm such a pathetic person sometimes.
Really.
When will I understand?
That its not worth it caring too much for others.
Nor is it any better being interested in supporting others.
I NEVER get the benefits I think I would...

How many more times do I have to fall?
... I won't give up getting back up again.
But all I'm asking is that you give me a break, God.
I'm kind of tired for the moment, of being let down.

I don't wanna feel like this all the time.
Especially not when the examinations are going on...

Yeah.
That's it.

Thanks :)