Dreams

Dreams.

It makes you wonder, doesn't it?
How it is supposed to help in the future..
If you might even get to succeed at what you're dreaming on and on about everyday.
The things you hope to do,
the things you hope to get...

Yes, it is difficult.
Who ever said it was going to be easy? :)
Nobody reaches their dreams without falling countless of times and getting back up, only to fall again.
Until one day, when all their mistakes have been learned and when everything is revealed,
.. I suppose there is no such thing.
After all, there is no finishing line in life, is there?
It never ever stops until, well..
you die.

Heh.

Sorry. Kinda got carried away there.

What I meant to say is that dreams aren't something that you should just think of everyday and put aside.. like its a illusion, a hopeless, impossible miracle.

Its not.

Nothing is impossible unless you limit yourself that way.
I only learned this much so far and yet I know there is so much more left for me to learn.

Dreams aren't something that are meant only for the talented and born-gifted people.
Dreams are something that anyone can have. Everyone.
Unless you do something about it, it certainly will remain an unreachable dream.


So keep at it.
Work hard.
Don't give up easily.
Keep your head up.
Smile.
Live.
Laugh.
Love.

Am I That Annoying To You?

Really?
We talk for less than 5 minutes, and suddenly you don't want to talk anymore.
We used to talk about everything .. and I mean EVERYTHING.
And now it just feels like we're strangers.
We have drifted really far away from each other, haven't we?

I must have been really annoying huh.

Well congratulations for successfully distancing yourself me.

Peering Out Into The Real World

Hi~
Okay.. so today, I went to the optical shop and re-adjusted my glasses. Now I feel a teensy weensy bit better I guess :/

doesn't matter.
So I was at the mall earlier today. Mid Valley. I love going to malls.
Malls have everything from food to fashion to any other household items you'd need.
Its also really great to see all the shoppers walking around in the mall.
I get to see the latest fashion/ everyone's different or unique taste.
I love seeing individualism. And I find that that's where I get to see them the most.

I also noticed how there are many couples walking around, cuddling (on the left as they should be) and smiling and other people being busy, walking briskly, while others are with friends and families.
And then I saw me.
Just me.
For the first time,
without judging if I was pretty or ugly, or smart or dumb, or worthless or worth it, or strong or weak.
I saw Rachel Tan.
I was shocked.

I saw a human. Who could do things some other people can't.
While others are having a happy love life, I had a happy family.
While some others were so busy, I was (you could say) quite free.
While some were upset, I was feeling fine.
While some people couldn't afford to eat, I could.
While some people were fat, I was average.
While some people had to beg for money, I could live well.

I saw that I was an average person totally capable of doing anything if I could just believe (Tribute to Whitney Houston's song  right here :D)

And I realized actually how much the world has been dirtied since some time ago.
More people are sinning: lying, robbing, raping, kidnapping, killing. Most of them without feeling the consequent remorse.
It really is shameful.
But then again, there are others who live as well as possible away from these things.
So I guess there are still some good in this world :)

Anyway,
That was a very VERY long unnecessary elaboration..
I was at the McD's waiting for the food to be served. (Since I was just sitting and not the one lining up :P)
And a little boy sat right next to me, with his small figure and huge eyes and long lashes and everything, he looked right at me.
And he was just SOOO darn CUTE! Though he was Malay, I'm not a racist so it doesn't really matter to me.

He was like staring at me for 30 seconds. And I did the same.
Then when his mum came, he pointed at me (while still looking at me) and said
"Cantik"

I was like:
Dumbfounded.
WOAH.
What.The. F.
Did he just call me pretty?

I was so happy.
He totally made my day.
If only he was older .. MUCH older, I would have fallen for him.
He's just SO FREAKIN adorable.
I still remember those huge eyes now :)

And so I realized how a simple word like that can make someone's day.
I just realized how selfish I have been all this time.
Keeping all my comments to myself and not letting people know about them,
I should.. especially when the are positive comments,
I want them to know it.

That they are worth it.
God made them just right.
And that they deserve everything.
As long as they work hard for it.

Therefore from today onwards, I'll try my best to tell people what I really think of them.
And not hide all the time (though I have to sometimes under certain circumstances)

This is what the real world is all about.
Cheating yourself, cheating others, or doing things to make this world a better place (tribute to Michael Jackson)

Good luck guys :)
Have a nice day and thanks for visiting.
xoxo

Goodbye Again :)

Hm.. I've been updating a lot recently..
But I'm sorry,
I won't be able to for some time again next week and after that because I've decided to focus on my studies..
No, I'm not saying I won't come back for a month or something like that,
its just gonna take longer for me to get back so..
yeah.
Goodbye.
OH!
And have a nice day ^^

Karma

Heey I'm back again.
I miss blogging and talking to.. well, literally, no one xD
But if there is someone, I would be glad :)

Anyway, so. About this karma.
I've been a little upset about the way people treat my honesty and loyalty these days.
For example, you have a sister or a friend that you are extremely close to,
and you've vowed never to tell her wrong doings or secrets to anyone.

She had never told you that she will do the same,
but you just assume she will because that's what best friends/sisters are for.

And all of a sudden,
without you noticing it,
she's gone behind your back and told everyone about your wrongdoings and lies and secrets.
Even though you've been keeping her secrets totally safe within you.
And you get all worked up and really mad because you wonder what in the world have you done to deserve this?

Nothing, of course.
Because you've always been the loyal one, the honest one, the caring one.
One day these things just hit you like a strong heat wave and it usually catches you unguarded.
You'll feel lost, depressed and most of all, angry.
But its not like you can do anything about it.

Its not like you should, in turn, go around telling everybody her secrets too.
Because that would make you just as ugly, distorted, annoying, disloyal and cunning as she is.
Its not like you have anyone else to tell this feeling of discontentment to either because she's really the only person you ever vent to.
So what do you do?

Here's my personal suggestion:

You wait.

For karma to strike back at her.
Don't get me wrong, I ain't cursing no one. Karma can be good or bad, depending on which position you're at.
You don't act repulsively. Stay calm and keep your mind distracted by doing things like watching a movie, or getting your homework done or surfing the net.
Time will pass by before you know it.

And if it takes karma too long to take its course,
don't worry.
The longer you wait, the harder the consequence will come down on her.

So what I'm trying to say is
don't ever do bad things. You try not too, since its impossible never to do bad things.
When you can, avoid doing them.

God (if you're a believer) will not punish the innocent, only the ones who have sinned and done wrong.

(If you're not a believer) They also say, what goes round comes around :)

WHEEE

Yeah hi there. Its been... 11 days since the last time I blogged.
I feel guilty for it and now it feels a little awkward to be blogging again X)
Anyway if you're reading this, thanks for stopping by my blog anyway.
I appreciate it.

I've just been so busy with my schedule in school and even back at home.
There seems to be exactly no time left for me to even blog anymore.
:( There are a terrible amount of things left for me to memorize now.
And yet, there is so little time

Pray for me?
I'll appreciate that a lot.
Life is a little difficult now because of school -.-
But I'm sure I'll get by and get used to it soon.
Thanks again for stopping by. See you next time.
Sayonara~

I'm So SO Tired

Lately, school has been a little bit of a drag.
School used to be so much fun.
Until the start of this year.
Homework. Tests. Homework. Tests. More homework. More revision.
And more tests.

Its like 24 hours aren't enough for a day.
I spent 1/3 of the day at school. The other third eating, taking a shower and doing my homework and revision.
And by the time I'm done with washing the dinner plates,
I have almost no time left for relaxation time.

Seriously.
I'm tired.
I want my old life back.
But I know it can never happen.
How childish it is for me to even think like that in the first place.

I just..
I need... some time off every now and then.
But I can't bring myself to because this is Form 4 and I need to put in more focus and concentration than usual.
Plus, its not like my mum'll let me cool off so often anyway.

So.. I'm forced to..
feel pressured?